If Called By An Anthem

At my local Chinese restaurant, The Golden Handshake, whenever you walk in, there’s an electronic door chime that rings out the first few bars of The Star-Spangled Banner. You go through the double doors, then: “O say can you see, by the dawn’s early light….” plinks out. If only the estate of Francis Scott Key received a royalty payment.

That “O say can you see” is almost as hard to sing as that great old line from the British (and formerly Australian) national anthem, God Save The Queen. “Lo-ong to-ooo reign over us”. That’s the hallmark of a great national anthem. A line normal humans have to struggle to sing on key.

The hallmark of a great rock anthem is the involvement of Jon Bon Jovi. “I’m a cowboy, on a steel horse I ride. I’m wanted dead or alive,” would sound lovely as a doorbell.

If I had my preference for what I wanted to hear lovingly rendered in chime the next time I’m in the mood for dim sum, it would be: “ and if you complain once more, you’ll meet an army of me.” Bjork, naturally.

Elevate The Insignificant,

Mr Trivia

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