Zeitgeisters, time for the confession. I watch CSI once a week. Any of the CSI‘s. It doesn’t matter which one. I don’t really care if it’s Miami, New York or Original Recipe. Although I know the Original Recipe crew by name. And I am even prepared to diss their hair when necessary.
I watch CSI Miami because I love things shot in an orangey palette. I also love the way that Horatio Kane (David Caruso) does that dog-with-head-tilted look. Unfortunately this look stands in for a number of emotions, “I’m trying to work out if you’re telling the truth”; “I know you’re not telling the truth and this head-tilt is intended to psych you out” and “If I weren’t in such deep emotional pain maybe you and I could have a shot at the big brass ring”. Like Roger Moore’s eyebrow and Bruce Willis’s smirk, the gesture doesn’t multi-task as well as the actor imagines.
I watch CSI New York because Gary Sinise’s character (Mac Taylor) is clearly ready to rip out the big one any moment; he is on the verge of going postal 24/7. But doesn’t. And there’s the unspoken chemistry between him and Melina Kanakaredes’ character (Stella Bonasera) which reminds me of the unspoken chemistry between me and Helen Koliopoulos in Year 8 Domestic Science class.
However I’ve seen most of the original CSI because William Petersen’s Grissom is the most annoying television sleuth bar none. He is cockier than Law and Order’s Goren, more scientifically adept than the eponymous Quincy and more self-righteous than Five O’s McGarret. He even has McGarret’s trademark quips. I may be misremembering this, but I believe in one ep. after a tsunami, a surfer was found dead at the top of an electricity pole, to which Grissom responded, “Surf’s up.” Y’gotta love that.
However, I am admitting this guilty pleasure by way of getting over my shock at last night’s ep. I suppose it was a repeat in Australia, anyway it’s from the fifth season show called “King Baby“. There’s a scene near the end where Gil Grissom and Catherine Willows (Marg Helgenberger) are celebrating Ground Hog Day in a fancy restaurant… or somethin’. The dialogue is as follows.
Gil: I’ve enjoyed working with you.
Catherine: Which part? The part where I got in your face or the part where I, uh, lost evidence, or uh, maybe you just miss me?
Gil: I did miss you. I missed your passion and your tenacity. I even missed your tush.
Catherine: Really. Thank you.
Now as far as I know, Grissom has always had a really half-baked thing for the character of Sara (Jorja Fox) which was very nicely explained by Television Without Pity’s CSI recapper Sobell. She went into some detail about their off-again, off-again non-relationship. So what’s with the tush comment, re Catherine, Gil? Trying to spice up your Vegas comedy routine ? Feel that a little inappropriate workplace banter would be a great way to bond with your female colleague? They were drinking champagne. Maybe Grissom is a cheap drunk? I really need this explained because I don’t believe it is referenced later and CSI is currently at Season 7.
It is as disturbingly out of character as the Fonz putting the moves on Mrs C in HAPPY DAYS. Its just plain wrong.
Could have been worse. Grissom could have regressed futher and used the terms, heinie or keaster.
Elevate the Insignificant.